is it bad that I feel enraged when some people are happy?

i am nothing but nice to anyone, and constantly just get shit. why? i don't get it. I'm in spanish. then art history. then driving. then sitting around. save me.

I just realized how depressing this whole blog has gotten. something needs to be done about this, ahaha.

I hate seeing happy people/couples

fuck all ya'll

wow.

I am really bummed right now. I'm not even excited about Philly tomorrow anymore..

a wave of people that I thought were my friends show a pretty strong dislike towards me now, what?

but anyway, art class today. I'm so hungry. I like college. philly this weekend. allentown fair.

I just realized.

life isn't fair. it gives two shits about no one. on the other hand, college orientation weekend was good. made a few friends, was pretty fun. got home, miserable. I know you saw it. I really can't tell if growing up is going to be rad or make me a sad wreck. hopefully in the end everything will make sense but for now gonna go with the floooow. everyone's settled into college already, me and tess are the only ones left. no one else shows any interest in seeing me. people I thought were close to me actually think that I'm lame, for the most part. I miss my friends, & I miss the past. but classes start tomorrow, hopefully that turns out well. I have a 7:30 am philosophy class, what a terrific way to start my school year & week. I'm excited though to meet new people and hopefully have fun. besides having feelings, life is pretty damn good. it's also really hot in this room. I'm probably just rambling by this point so I'm just going to stop. happy sunday.